Yard curses

Heavy hail shredded the banana fronds and peach leaves yesterday and left the yard looking like Aspen on a fine winter day.

There was rain too, of course, which does not fall in March in proper times.

The incessant summer rains are quite enough, manufacturing constant yard work, but winter and spring usually provide a rest.  Not this year.

The yard is green.  The plants are growing.  And I’m even older than yesterday. With no gardener.

I’ve already decided against ever planting anything new out there.  What I have is at the point of being overwhelming.

I could get a gardener, but there’s the cost, minding a schedule and dealing with another human being.  And none of that appeals in the slightest.

I just spent over an hour outside with an aluminum ladder, rake, monster clippers and a wheelbarrow, trying to maintain a little decorum because I’m a decorous guy.

In a just world I would have been born a king or at least a prince.  I would have had servants, retainers, jesters and, of course, concubines.

And lots of gardeners.

But I am a peon who does his own yard work and cusses, but then I spot a hummingbird or a rare tropical butterfly, and things don’t seem so bad after all.

23 thoughts on “Yard curses”

  1. We have a guy who will come and do everything we request whenever we want him…200 pesos regardless of what is asked of him…I also just put a bird bath in the courtyard…the Mexican birds are just not into it for some reason…maybe I should fill it with some Jose Cuervo…Happy St. Pat’s day to you and the Lady!

    P.S. Word around these parts has it that you ARE the king of Patzcuaro…you need to get a better PR person…and maybe invest in a few of Pope Benny’s slightly used garments and crowns when he is in town…

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    1. Charles: I do get a gardener in the summer, but I don’t have one right now, and it’s borderline. Funny that your bird bath has no takers. Mine is always busy with birds. You say you JUST put the bird bath out there. Be patient.

      It’s St. Pat’s Day? Hadn’t realized. Ain’t no Irish folks in my neighborhood.

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  2. Never enjoyed having outside help because it’s intrusive. We do have yard workers once a week that we call “Mow and Blow.” Then the once-a-week housekeeper that keeps us honest by keeping the house clean for her.

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    1. Carole: That curse of American life, the leaf-blower, is very rarely seen in my area. Or heard, thank God. Truth is that I recall having seen one down here just once in 12 years.

      Housekeeper? Got no housekeeper. We’ve had two in the distant past. You have to be quite careful with maids here because people steal. Not rare at all.

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  3. A normal St. Pat’s day here in Ohio is snow and wind and who in their right mind holds a parade in March kind of day. This year it may hit 80.

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  4. We just got inside from a small garden project of Sra. Cuevas. We were erecting a short length of trellis over the peas and frijoles bed. Fortunately, our neighbor, Sr. M. was watching us struggle with barely contained mirth, and we invited him to help. Together we got the damn thing well seated into the fertile soil.

    Now we need to get our LP gas and hot water heater going, because as of this morning, I’ve been unable to light it. (Yes, the tank is full.)

    Saludos,
    Don Cuevas

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      1. Because, Felipe, it makes Sra. Cuevas happy to grow her own vegetables. And when she’s happy, then I’m happy.

        Also, these are sugar snap peas and Romano beans.

        Saludos,
        Don Cuevas

        PS: Got the hot water heater going by the trick of holding down the dial, or whatever it’s called, just a little further when lighting the pilot.

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  5. Yep, the picture is clear. Faded frayed blue overalls, cocked straw hat to one side, rake in one hand, Señor Zapata tending to the garden.

    Only thing missing in that picture are the chickens running around your feet.

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  6. Maybe you should consider letting the yard go native. Maybe plant a few things that would do well left to their own devices, and then leave things to their own devices.

    Desire is, after all, the root of misery.

    Saludos,

    Kim G
    Boston, MA
    Where for years we have mostly applied such a Zen outlook to our garden.

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    1. Kim: I am far too fastidious to let the yard go native. What I want to eliminate most of all is the pinche grass. I hope to at least get started on that next year. Better to have stone and cement beneath one’s feet.

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  7. Kim, our back yard is very native. If there were a Neighborhood Beautification Committee, it surely would be cited for sheer ugliness. Fortunately, there is no such committee! ¡Ándale!

    Saludos,
    Don Cuevas

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    1. Don Cuevas,

      I grew up in a forest which was lovely without any iota of our own intervention, so this whole notion of yardwork is a smidgen foreign to me.

      And Felipe, I myself have vastly reduced the amounts of pinche grass in my own yard, and replaced a large chunk of it with a gravel patio. If you get crushed 3/8″ stone (sharp edges, not rounded) you can even put patio furniture on it and once the gravel has settled, the furniture doesn’t sink in.

      Kim G

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  8. We had unseasonable, unreasonable rains, here, too. But I think the sky has dried up. It’s hot and dusty, as it should be in the middle of March. I lack a gardener, too. And like you, sometimes, not all of the time, I am grateful for a beautiful visitor or two.

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  9. LOVE not having grass. The pathways are stoned, (ha) and the larger walkways are large pavers and concrete with large flower beds to enjoy as one walks the paths. I HIGHLY recommend it. I cut my last lawn when i sold my house in Nassau Bay in 1995. Said, “Never again.” What a thankless task.

    The gardener I have is not truly a gardener, just a sweeper and waterer. I enjoy doing the other stuff. And I NEVER give him the clippers. I did once. My ferns looked like they had been eaten alive. I didn’t say anything, I just vowed then to never give him the clippers again, ha.

    Watering here both on the entry level and the roof takes close to 1 1/2 hours. I like having him do that a couple of times a week. I know, I know, the height of laziness, but heck, its about time I get lazy!

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    1. Ms. Babs: I have seen your yard, of course, and it’s my ideal. No grass. I wish I could say that I cut my last yard in 1995, but I cannot. I cut my last grass in 2011 with the mower and a couple of days ago with the weedeater.

      One characteristic of the locals that never ceases to amaze me is that they overdo so many things. Washing, trimming, cutting, romancing, you name it, and it’s done to death.

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      1. I don’t think that’s just a local thing happens in many places NE, I’m with Babs, concrete and pavers. Flower planters to fuss with are great, I have plenty of indoor and out — I enjoy the watering, planting, their flowering and different shapes of their leaves that I find therapeutic. On the other hand mowing — some people actually find that relaxing, but that’s not me.

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