Beware

The Mexican Embassy in Washington D.C. has issued a Travel Warning for its citizens in the United States.

Due to growing violence, particularly the terrorist attack in Boston, all nonessential travel to the State of Massachusetts is deemed inadvisable.

Today’s Travel Warning follows those issued earlier regarding travel to Chicago, Detroit, New Orleans, Oakland and many other metropolitan areas where civil order is disintegrating due to America’s embrace of multiculturalism, non-judgmentalism and moral relativism.

While millions of Mexicans safely visit the United States every year for tourism, study, lawn care and picking peanuts, travelers should remain vigilant and refrain from bringing attention to themselves by speaking Spanish.

Stay tuned for additional advisories.

Better yet, paisanos, just come home where you’re safe.

22 thoughts on “”

  1. Regardless of your satire, I feel much safer and healthier in Michoacan, where half the people I meet practice their English on me. It appears to me that most Mexicans have an unrequited love for the USA, which is inexplicable to me.

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  2. I’m thinking about going to Mexico for safety and a cheap colonoscopy. Combine a little siesta time with affordable healthcare

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  3. Maybe I should start asking friend NOB how they feel living in such a crime-infested country. After all the shootings, murders, their only safe havens are gated communities. We were planning a trip north, but I think we will now postpone it, because of all the crime! Worse yet, the corruption of the local governments, stopping drivers with cellphones and GPS in their hands and forcing payment up to $500 dollars in mandated court fees to support their corruptible government.

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  4. Excellent! So good I had to share on FB. Hope it’s OK. If not let me know where to send the royalty checks. Saludos!

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  5. Could not have said it better. Of course, here in Texas we have arsenals in our homes for protection. However, how can we protect ourselves from the random violence that is on the rise when we are outside the comfort and safety of our homes?

    I suppose the obvious answer is to move to Mexico!!!!!!!! (I know how fond you are of multiple exclamation marks.)

    My Mexican amigos have been saying for years that the majority of the violence in Mexico is drug and cartel related. They feel that in the U.S. the violence is so random that it is difficult to feel safe anywhere. Of course, they are right.

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    1. Connie: There is no doubt whatsoever in my mind that one is generally far safer below the border. And your other Mexican amigos are correct. If you’re not a cop, soldier or narco, you’re very unlikely to get shot. People don’t pull up next to you at stoplights, and shoot you for the fun of it. You won’t get a gun stuck in your face at Burger King’s drive-through. Never heard of a home invasion down here. Nobody puts explosives in mailboxes for kicks. The list is long.

      We Mexicans are a far more peaceable people.

      As for multiple exclamation points, keep your eyes open, and you’ll notice that, with very rare exceptions, only women do it. It’s an odd phenomenon, a gender characteristic. Use as many as you like. No problem. Caress your feminine side!

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  6. Let’s see…

    The Boston Police, FBI, and likely other federal agencies are literally working around the clock to figure out who bombed the Boston Marathon. They may even have someone in custody. Even if they don’t have someone now, they will likely figure out who did it and arrest them in time.

    After 9/11, the USA began to systematically exterminate Al Queda leaders, and got Osama Bin Laden in 2011. Justice is still being served in that case, despite it having happened over ten years ago.

    Timothy McVeigh was found, tried, convicted, and executed for the bombing of the Oklahoma Federal Building in fairly short order.

    Most serial killings are eventually solved, and the perpetrators go to jail. Ted Kazinsky, the “unibomber” was finally arrested, tried, and sent to jail.

    What notable crimes exactly have the Mexican authorities solved and prosecuted? Any? Because if they have, I don’t know any Mexicans who know about this.

    Did they ever find the perpetrators behind the Morelia New Year’s Bombing?

    Did they ever find the people who left severed heads in Juarez, Tijuana, along highways in Veracruz, and in myriad other places? Have any of these perpetrators even been arrested, much less tried and convicted?

    I heard that “El Chapo” Guzman escaped a ‘maximum security’ Mexican prison. That’s not something that happens NOB. Once criminals here are jailed, they stay jailed.

    Ciudad Juarez is practically a ghost town because the police and army can’t control the violence.

    And F has friends who suffered a home-invasion robbery in the State of Mexico a few months back. His friends were tied up, gagged, and held at gunpoint while their home was stripped of anything valuable. I think the robbers are still at large.

    And, as you well know, no Mexican calls the police if he can possibly avoid it as he knows all too well that they are as bad as the criminals, and at best, little to no help.

    Sure, there are problems in the USA, but it’s laughable to compare them with Mexico.

    So, no. Any serious consideration of the evidence can only conclude that Mexico’s criminal justice system is corrupt, ineffectual, and completely lacking the faith of the Mexican citizenry. It doesn’t matter what Gringos think; the Mexicans know the system doesn’t work.

    Saludos,

    Kim G
    Boston, MA
    Where, within 48 hours, the police had in custody some drug dealer who shot someone on the subway platform here last year, a story which amazes my Mexican friends.

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    1. Kim: If, one day, you live in Mexico, instead of your relatively brief visits, and especially outside of tumultuous Mexico City where you almost always stay, you will better feel the very different tone that exists here, believe it or not.

      Yes, the Gringo cops will likely find the Boston culprits, and that’s good. And the American cops, perhaps more often than not, usually catch criminals, especially the famous cases. That doesn’t, however, contradict the underlying theme of my brief, snarky post, which is that it is safer to live here than up there. That is, of course, less so along the border, but the border zone is a thing unto itself.

      What notable crimes have the Mexican cops solved? Beats me. Many, likely most, violent encounters, as noted, take place between crooks and cops and soldiers. The rest of us get left out of it.

      The thrust of your comment is that crimes are more likely solved up there than down here, and that the Gringo justice system works better. No doubt, all of that. But it’s not what I was writing about.

      As for the justice system here, a broad reform was passed during Felipe Calderón’s administration, and it’s being phased in as we speak. I am guardedly optimistic. We are doing away with our old justice system that takes place almost entirely behind closed doors. Hooray!

      But that’s not the point of this post. The point is that you are safer down here than up there. By far. Except in traffic.

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  7. Since you are a local and have insight into local events, my curious mind was wondering if you have a background story about the son-in-law of (the mayor) that was recently killed in front of the regional hospital in (the state capital) on the last day of February?

    Thanks

    Enrique

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    1. Enrique: I have heard conflicting reports about that event. One is that he was not the target, that another of our mayor’s relatives was the intended victim. But, apropos of my post, that was not an act of random violence. It had to do, I think, perhaps with political corruption and/or personal vendetta. God knows. Rumor is rampant here in all areas of life. It’s hard to keep things straight, or to believe half the things people tell you.

      Hope this was helpful, but I doubt it.

      By the way, the latest on the big shoot-’em-up that took place in the nearby motel that I mentioned a few days ago is that there was a lone member of a gang of extortionists in the hotel doing the wild thing with his 15-year-old girlfriend. The cops were tipped off and an army of very heavily armed law-enforcement types showed up. The miscreant had only a pistol, which he quite foolishly fired at the lawmen. The latter then turned the hotel room into Swiss cheese. He was not read his Miranda rights. There were photos in the local media. The girl was wounded, not fatally, and the extortionist, an Army deserter, was captured without a hole in him.

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