Marriage perp walk

Julie

LET US CONTINUE down Failed Romance Lane. We’ve already passed the Argentine penthouse and the First Marriage Apartment, so the only address left is the Second Marriage Ranch House.

The photo, which I should have taken better care of, is from 1979, and it was taken in New Orleans. We did not move to Houston and purchase the Second Marriage Ranch House till the mid-1980s.

Meet Julie.

I was with Julie the longest of all, about 19 years, but we were married for only the last decade. I have been married to my Mexican child bride for 13 years, but we lived together just a few months before the wedding.

Julie and I met at a French Quarter party in New Orleans. I arrived with two dates, one of whom was married to somebody else, and I was drunk as the proverbial skunk. I could hardly stand up.

Julie told me years later that the first thing she noticed was how pretty I was. The second was how drunk I was. Forget him, she thought.

But my rakish charm won out in the end. But not that evening.

A sharp observer might notice my glassy eyes in the photo. Yes, I was happily under the influence. I mention this issue — again — because there are few people more annoying than a reformed boozer. Perhaps someone who’s stopped smoking. I did that too, years later. Ahem!

During our many years together, I supported us while Julie bounced from one business venture to another, all of which failed. It was only after she dumped me in 1995 did she become self-sustaining, by necessity, eventually earning far more than I ever did. She’s a computer wizard.

Necessity is the mother of invention.

She lives today in that Houston ranch house, which was entirely in my name after the divorce, but which I gave to her as a gift the following year because I am a really nice guy — or a total idiot — depending on whom you ask.

I prefer the first option. My mother embraced the second.

9 thoughts on “Marriage perp walk”

  1. An’ it’s all right now, yeah, learned my lesson well.
    You see, ya can’t please everyone, so you got to please yourself.

    Rick Nelson – Garden Party Lyrics

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  2. Well, you were nice to give her the house. When my parents divorced, my father gave my mother the house too, so you’re not alone. And I think it was probably the right thing to do in both cases.

    Saludos,

    Kim G
    Boston, MA
    Where we have mixed feelings about home ownership in general.

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    1. Kim: Now, 20 years later, I really don’t regret giving her the house. It has really increased in value, however, and that pains me a bit. And let’s not overlook the fact that it was her who ended the marriage.

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    1. Scott: Nobody ever has. I normally do not, but I see what you are talking about with that particular photo. The scarf likely adds to the resemblance. I’ve never been as fat as Pavarotti, but in the photo I was about 50 pounds heavier than I am now. I took the weight off in 1980, and I’ve kept it off ever since.

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        1. Bonnie: Few people would. I really don’t know what’s wrong with me.

          In all seriousness, why not? Makes for fun reading, I hope, and it all happened so long ago. A classic example of water over the dam.

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