Buttcrack baby

(Viewer discretion advised. Video includes appalling moments.)


As has been mentioned here previously, my child bride has turned to other activities over the past year due to the Kung Flu hysteria, temporarily halting her sidewalk pastry sales. She has turned to crochet.

Up to now, she has created elephants, Rotweillers, unicorns, lions, camels and so on, but now she’s tackled the human form. Some of you might want to avert your eyes from the video. You’ve been warned.

The dress is separate and removable as are the sandals and panties.

The child in question is named Matilda. She is a white girl, which means she was born with privilege, giving her a pass through an easy, blessed life. Next on the crochet list, however, will be a chocolate child who will, of course, be oppressed.

I am not making this up. Stay tuned.

A Wednesday rundown

AT 8:30 A.M., I was parked in my post-pajama attire outside a tire outlet on the ring road with the intention of buying four new tires.

I arrived just moments before the joint opened and purchased Goodyears. My previous tires lasted the kilometer equivalent of about 30,000 miles and 2.5 years. I would have preferred more of both those measures. This new set cost the peso equivalent of about $367 U.S.

Having no point of comparison, I don’t know if that’s good or bad.

The new tires mean one thing:  I will be keeping the 2009 Honda indefinitely, not switching it for a new Kia Soul, which I’d been thinking of doing.

The Honda runs fine, so …

* * * *

Perhaps you know that a cabal of social media providers simultaneously threw Alex Jones, the Infowars fellow, into oblivion this week for no reason other than they do not like what comes from his mouth.

This is a very bad thing.

Jones is an objectionable fellow, I’ll grant, but the left-wingers crushed him because they disagree with his opinions. I heard something interesting this morning. It’s that virtually all of the world’s social media comes from within 300 miles of San Francisco.

Chew on that.

Some are calling Jones the canary in the mine.

Though Trump sits in the Oval Office, the Bolsheviks still control most of the important sectors of society in the Western World.

It’s a good time to be old and approaching death.

* * * *

It’s a lovely, cool August day here. After picking up the Honda at 10 a.m. and smooth-riding back to the Hacienda on new rubber, we ate cereal. My child bride cooked pinto beans for lunch this afternoon. We always have roasted chicken and beans on Wednesday.

I showered and dressed, did some plant trimming in the yard, swept the veranda, and now I’m going to the Jesus Patio and put my feet up.

* * * *

The news from yesterday was that I had a gold crown fall off one of my back molars. A few hours later I walked into a dental office on Romero Street, and a pretty young dentist reconnected it lickety-split for about $15 U.S.

 

Two birds, one stone

upstairs

FIRST BIRD:

This lovely photo of the upstairs terraza was taken years ago, but don’t be fooled. It’s the worst spot of the house.

Doing a 180, and taking another shot, you get this below, which was taken within the last year.

new-image

The chairs are the same, but the table now lives on the balcony of our downtown Casita, and the umbrella rotted from blazing sun and scorching heat.

For years I had a hammock under the roof tile, which covers a small percentage of the overall terraza, but in time I found myself rarely using it, so I gave it away.

Nowadays nobody goes out there much. No plant survives there except for cacti. Due to the floor being too level, a pond lives out there, ignoring the drain holes, covering about a fifth of the area, through the five rainy months.

A few years ago, a big section of the ceramic floor buckled from the heat and sun, and had to be replaced.

The spot should have been planned better during the construction, but it wasn’t. A darn shame. Mistakes happen when you’re too cheap to hire an architect.

SECOND BIRD:

new-imageCan’t let a post slip by without a political element, at least not these glorious days.

Fidel Castro died. This may be the best month in decades. First, Donald Trump wins. Then Castro dies. Some are suggesting a connection, but I doubt it.

I was saddened, but not surprised, to see Mexican President Enrique Peña Nieto expressing sorrow for the pendejo’s overdue death. I voted for Peña Nieto.

But even more appalling is the reaction of Canada’s Prime Minister Justin Trudeau who described Fidel as a “remarkable leader” and “legendary revolutionary.”

You cannot argue with either of those descriptions, but Trudeau meant them positively, not negatively.

Trudeau is a world-class ignoramus, and Canadians must be so proud. I guess he’s never been in Cuba, and if he has, he got the standard whitewash tour delivered by despots.

I have been in Cuba. A snarky hats-off to the Canuck nincompoop PM for inspiring me to link to this.

Let’s take both these birds and flip them toward Prime Minister Trudeau, using two hands.

One smart lesbian

AS MOST BLACK folks knee-jerk vote for the Democrat Party, so do most gals and guys who are gay, one assumes.

Here is a refreshing exception.