(May 12 update: The following was written in a moment of complete insanity. I have jumped wholeheartedly on the Trump Train! Here’s The Thinking Man’s Guide to Donald Trump, which appeared in The American Spectator.)
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IT’S OFFICIAL: I’m boarding the Hillary train, a pact with the lesser Devil. Forgive me, Lord.
This is not a joke.
The sharper among you will think: Have you lost your freakin’ mind? Not at all. Here is my line of thought:
Trump will win the Republican nomination — or he won’t. If he does, let’s look at some facts. Only around 30-35 percent of Republicans like him. Most, including me, do not.
Women of both parties dislike him up to around 75 percent, say polls. And the dislike one feels for Trump is not a trivial thing. It is a loathing. Against Hillary, he will lose.
Suppose, by some slight of hand, he does not get nominated. He’s such an egomaniac he will run on his own, diverting enough GOP votes to hand the election to Hillary.
Remember that Ralph Nader got George W. Bush elected in 2000 by doing precisely the same thing.
Trump is a horror. The faucets in his personal airliner are gold-plated á la Saddam Hussein. His arrogance is blinding. His conservative credentials are like Swiss cheese.
He’s left a line of purchased trophy wives in his wake, including the current one who’s posed naked. Do not think Eleanor Roosevelt, Bess Truman or Nancy Reagan.*
He is crass. He sneers like Mussolini.
After eight years of Weepy Barry, the United States needs this colossally self-centered Bozo?
Now let’s look at Hillary. She’s bad, but she’s not dreadful. Most importantly, she is not a left-wing, politically correct fanatic à la Weepy Barry and Ole Bernie.
Sure, she mouths those things now and then, but it’s just for votes. Trust me on this.
Hillary spent eight years in the White House, loved it, and desires to return. And she wants to go down in history as the first woman president. This is what drives her.
She’s humorless and cackles like a hyena. But compared to Trump, she’s superior presidential material. I think she would steer a somewhat middle course in the Oval Office.
Somewhat. With Bill’s guiding hand.
With luck, the Republicans will nominate an inspiring, reasonable candidate in 2020, someone who can steer the Ship of State back on course a little bitty bit. To the right.
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FLY IN THE OINTMENT
Trump initially flew out of the gate saying stuff so many of us were thinking. Stop invaders with no visas at the border. Enough with the PC stupidities. He sounded great, if a bit overboard.
But time passed. It became clear that this politically vague narcissist simply wants to be atop the world. He became a fly in the Republican stew, and not just any housefly, but that more disgusting sort, the bluebottle fly also known as the common blow fly. It often sits atop a pile of steaming crap.
Patience — 2016 just isn’t our year. Vote Hillary.
People will weary of her cackle within four years.
Trust me on this.
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* Nothing wrong with posing naked, but you don’t want the First Lady to have done it. Leave that to the fun-loving French.
(Trump’s popularity is a reaction to the corroding American culture. A previous post addressed this sad fact.)